Things On My Mind

 I'm beginning to believe that there is a positive energy all around us, and we are able to tap into it whenever we need to. From about the end of April till about a week ago, I was able to perceive and draw healing power from this energy. I don't know why I don't feel it as strongly today as I did several days ago. It may be connected to how willing I am to receive it, and how much I believe it even exists. What if it's just the chemicals in my body reacting to the environment and activities I am doing? I'm still trying to figure out all of it, and explain it without sounding too crazy! 😁 

I've been spending a lot of time outdoors lately, and it's then that I have felt such a profound sense of wellness. Often, I am stopped in my tracks to take in all of the beauty around me, and I can't help but form the thought, Thank you, God! I still can't say for certain that I know God exists, but I am beginning to at least strongly believe. Something beautiful and full of love created this breathtaking world we live in, and I honestly believe it was a loving Heavenly Father. The healing energy I've been feeling lately I believe comes from Him. It's His love, and it's the only thing that has worked in keeping me in recovery from addiction for over three years. I was heavily into some major drugs for two decades, and I often felt like I would never be free, but now I'm beginning to thrive and it's thanks to my beliefs in a God Who is always willing to heal us if we will allow Him. 

It has been a while since I've written a post. I think about my blog often and of my desire to share my experience, strength and hope with anyone who might be in need of it. The desire can be so strong at times, but the fear that I may not be making a difference or I might offend someone by what I say or a million other fears can stop me from acting on that desire. We all experience trauma of some sort, whether it's due to our own choices or the choices of others. Trauma can come from addiction, abuse, and a thousand other sources. We are connected by the fact that every human will experience pain to some degree at some time in our lives. That may sound dismal, and it can be, but beauty can be found in this connection when someone reaches out to another who is struggling to stay above the waves in the chaotic sea of life. So many people need to be supported, encouraged, and lifted by those who are willing and strong enough to do it. Why can't that support come from me or you? You don't have to be a superhero to make a difference. I have a plaque hanging above my sink that quotes "to the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world." I can't become overwhelmed when I consider those who may be in need, as I often do because I so strongly desire for everyone around me to feel loved and secure. The desire to help someone and share your hope with them is noble and divine, but we can only act within our capacity and willingness to serve, both of which will grow a bit each time you reach out to someone in selfless love. Go easy on yourself, and start with small random acts of kindness, and I promise the desire to serve and share more will grow. The fear that you are not enough to make a difference will dissipate, and let me tell you, that is an excellent feeling. 

There are still days where I really struggle with anxiety. Many times, I have been stumped when I try to figure out the source of it, but lately I've noticed that I'm usually feeling it when I'm worrying about the future or the past. Thoughts like, how am I going to get of debt and put more into savings? or why didn't I listen more to what so-and-so had to say? I must have seemed so rude. You may know exactly what I'm talking about. These thoughts can be so incessant, and there are times where I don't even realize they are running through my head ON REPEAT until I take second to pay attention to how I'm feeling. When I do this, I'll notice the tightness in my chest, an increased heart rate, and a flushed face, among other symptoms. That's when I realize there are alarms going off telling me to take a second and just breathe and realize I can give all my worries and fears to God. He is teaching me how to live in the moment, where life is happening, where I'm being blessed and strengthened. It's a beautiful feeling, and it has preserved me during each moment of each day.

Speaking of living in the moment, I've been practicing some awesome breathwork lately that has really helped me stay more grounded throughout the day. Almost every morning, I'm taking about 15 minutes to breathe and do something called a body scan. If you haven't tried it, I highly recommend it, especially if you are experiencing anxiety and depression. I have suffered from both of these ailments for many years, but many of my symptoms have been alleviated by frequent meditation. I'm hoping it can happen for you, but if it doesn't and you are having daily struggles with anxiety and/or depression, please reach out to a professional for help. Heavenly Father has given us all we need to be well, and sometimes the source comes in another person who is trained and willing to help those who are suffering. 

Here a couple of guided meditations I've found on YouTube centered around breathwork/body scanning. I hope they can be useful to you!

When I first started meditating, it felt odd at times, and I think that's normal. Some of the things I was being asked to do in guided meditations on YouTube were downright silly to me. I stuck with it though and found my own flow and the benefits have been vast. Please give it a try. This world can be such a busy and distracting place, and it's important that we each take the time to be calm and go inward. 

I hope you are all doing well! You are in my thoughts and prayers often. We owe it to each other and our recovery to lend a helping hand when it's needed. Please reach out to me at comeandrecover@gmail.com if you need someone to talk to. You can learn more about me by checking out my Facebook profile or by clicking here., which will take you to my blog welcome page. Remember that you are loved so much and never alone. God bless you all.