Let's all face it, being an adult is hard, and recovery is very rewarding but it presents many difficult challenges. Sometimes I don't feel motivated to do responsible things, like going to work or cleaning my apartment. I often use this as an excuse to not do those things that we all need to do if we are to thrive. Fear and anxiety can dominate some of my days, and the couch and I will form a very close bond. On those days, I just want to be outside flourishing in the sun, laughing and being with my loved ones, but sometimes I just don't feel up to it.
Not too long ago, I was listening to a program and the commentator quoted motivational guru Heidi Grant. She said:
“If you are sitting there, putting something off because you don’t feel like it, remember that you don’t actually need to feel like it.”
(Click here to read her full article)
A light bulb went of off inside my head! I love those moments of clarity that can shed light on such some of life's major issues. I don't need to feel like going to work to get my foot out the door. I need to do it because it's the right thing to do, and it's crucial to my independence. And you know what? On those days when I really struggle to get to work, I feel fine once I get there, and I have a great day. It's just getting past that feeling of fear or being unmotivated. You don't have to feel like it to start your recovery, but if you want a better life, you will do it anyway. Just take one small step by going to a support group or reaching out to supportive family member or friend. Ever since I read this article, my thoughts about being responsible and all the hardships that come from being an adult have changed. I have hope that if I keep doing the hard things, they will get easier, and I will find more fulfillment in taking care of myself.
When I was in active addiction, I relied on everyone else to take care of me. I felt like it was my family's responsibility to do so which was a major thinking error. My main focus was getting my next fix, no matter what the cost. I abused so many friendships during the course of my addiction and burned so many bridges. I never thought that I would be able to be independent; I was completely unmotivated to learn self-reliance. About four years ago, my use sky-rocketed and I was using more than I ever had. I was practically squatting at my ex's house and my life was quickly crumbling away into chaos. I didn't know where to go or what to do. One day, I called a friend and asked for help. She helped me move back to southern Utah, and very slowly, I found the motivation to start piecing my life back together. Many days, I didn't feel like repairing all the damage I had done to myself and others, but I did it anyway. I started telling myself that I could do the hard things, and ignored the negative voice inside my head that told me I couldn't. There is power in the words we use, especially the ones we say to ourselves. Bruce Lee once said:
I came across this quote about three years ago, and it has stuck with me over since. It sounded true to me, and I really started practicing better self-talk. It worked for me, and it still works today. I found my motivation to thrive increased exponentially. If you're in the habit of talking down to yourself, I challenge you to start using kinder and more positive self-talk. You may notice results right away, but after a few weeks, you'll start feeling like a new person, more confident and happy. It worked for me, and I know it can work for anyone else who embraces this technique.
Life isn't meant to be easy. A friend once told me that we wouldn't learn very much if life didn't challenge us. When you're having a bad day and anxiety is draining your motivation, please tell yourself I can do this! Say it often, believe in it, believe in God, be patient with yourself, and a life of happiness will begin to unfold before you. Have a blessed day! 💓
See the link below for more inspiration about motivation:
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I love this!!! So many people don't do things because they don't feel like it, including me!! BUT, once I overcome this mindset and become productive---I feel so much better!!! I will need to read the article and watch the video!! This blog is great!! When can I share??
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